1. Do you slaughter animals regularly?
Yeah, in fact, I have a pile of carcasses lying all around the house! I mean, really?
2. Do you love goats?
Yes off course...I just married a goat for mutton!
3. Were your ancestors from Iraq?
Yeah and I also own a bunch of ancestral oil wells as well!
4. Do you feel hungry during your fast?
No way, don’t you know that we are fitted with special chips to control hunger!
5. Are you forced to wear "that thing" on your head?
That thing's called a veil and no...I can wear it if I choose to.You wanna know what that thing on your head would be called when I hit with a bat?
6. How do you see, hear, feel, eat/drink or for that matter think inside that veil?
I acquired a couple of tricks from The Darth Vader. May the force be with me!
7. You must feel lucky 'coz you can have as many wives as you want.
Yes, Did you know my 8th mother was her 38th mother’s only daughter! Totally fed up!
8. You’re a Muslim, so you’re obviously good at Arabic?
You must be really good at Hebrew? You will say it’s irrelevant, but then who started it ?
9. Don’t mind me asking, but do you have any connections with any terrorist organizations?
Yeah, I distribute them terror licenses. And I sort of feel the need of giving them a call now you a**hole!
10. You must have been to Saudi Arabia or any other part of the Middle East?
Yeah, that's where I go to all the freaking time because there's no other place I'd rather be! BTW do you plan on financing my next trip?
11. How did you feel about Bin Laden's death?
I cried my eyes out and I also have a memorial by his name in my backyard. You want me to bring him back to life to kill you?
12. Do they have cars where you come from?
No we ride around the city on camels but only when our horses are broken!
13. Do you eat Biryani every day?
Yes, I have like 3 plates full for breakfast, lunch and dinner each! Moron!
14. You don’t consume pork because it’s one of your Gods?
Like Seriously !! Also we don’t drink alcohol does that mean it’s one of our Gods! Wait till I make a pork sandwich out of your face!
15. Why don’t you drink alcohol?
I don’t really like the idea of ending this way!
16. What do you do for “fun” if you don’t drink?
Ummmm...let me see...I slaughter, eat Biryani and run terrorist organizations! What do you think I do?
17. You think I can be a Muslim if I grow a beard like you?
JUST KILL ME ALREADY!